All you ever hear anyone say about motherhood is how wonderful it is, how much they love having kids and they can't imagine life without them because they are so wonderful. Then they throw up rainbows all over you with their happy motherhood stories. In our society we are not allowed to say bad things about motherhood because then you are seen as a horrible mother. I never say what I really think because then I'm judged as being a bad mom. Some of you may be thinking, "don't care what people think", trust me I would love to but that is impossible for me. In my mind every single person in the world is judging me and thinking how horrible I am, how horrible I look, etc....but I am getting off topic...
Don't you ever just think "damn being a mother sucks ass!"? Think about it we have to wake up with them, clean after them, feed them, and basically end our lives for them. Dads don't, they get to go on going out with friends, and enjoying life like a normal person. Moms, ha!, we get to raise to kids who for a few years when they hit puberty will hate us with every bone in their body. Yes when they hit young adult they will like us again, but by that time it won't matter because they won't be in our house throwing fits about stupid things.
So why this post? I am annoyed at the fact that I have hobbys, I have other interests, but I am not allowed to do them during the day. My kids throw a fit if I go near the computer, near my wheel, near a spindle, or anything I may want to do for fun because they want to eat my day away with toys and cleaning. If you are a mom you know what I am talking about! We all end up spending our day cleaning and entertaining them with the thought of "when they go to bed it will all be about me", but then bedtime comes...and you have more to do! You have to get work done or school, so where does the "me time" come in? Ha! Me time, such a funny thought, you're a mom now me time is a figment of your imagination! Even society tells us that we are horrible if we even think about wanting me time, "you should be happy being a stay at home!". Well I call bullshit society! Don't get me wrong I love being a stay at home mom, and I hope I never work a day in my life, but it sucks! It sucks the big one when you are not allowed to do anything! I am to the point where I am seriously about to sell off all my craft supplies and clear out my studio completely, why have it when I can't even use it?!
....do you hear it...society wanting to scream at me for thinking motherhood sucks, and I bet some of you want to do the same, don't you?
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Let's get personal
I need some place to vent out personal things about what i go through that many may not want to read on Facebook, so shall we start?
While pregnant with Caroline, Sloan and i came to the decision that we did not want any more kids. Also my OB recommended we do not have another baby because of my small pelvis it was getting to dangerous. Two was the limit which was fine with us, because I think two is more than enough for us! So, with this it meant getting a tubal ligation during my c-section when I had Caroline. Although it has been almost three years i still remember my OB explaining to me that I may have worse periods after my ligation, but I laughed at that. Since I was 10 years old my periods have been horrible, like soaking tampons can't get out of the fetal position cramps, and bloating...ugh it was horrible. So, yeah i thought "ha can't be any worse!"....I was wrong.
The first year after Caroline I went about 7 months without having period, and when I finally did start it was HELL!!!! Ever since that one my periods vary, I can go a few months where it is so light I don't need anything, which you would think "Oh how nice!". Yeah its nice for the time being, but I know what will soon come... After a few months of light periods I get HELL all over again. It is as if my body is trying to clear everything out that did not get out over the past few months. Cramps are like labor, and bloating is INSANE! In fact this week I have gained 10 lbs thanks to bloating, yes ten! I started today, and I gained another three lbs, so since Saturday I have gained 13 lbs, thirteen! It will all go away once HELL is over, but right now I look and feel horrible. I do not understand why I gain so much, it's not like I go all crazy and eat my way through a room full of food or anything! Nothing changes actually, I eat normal and sometimes less because of damn cramps. Besides I don't think you gain 13 lbs normally just by eating, right?
So...don't get your tubes tied kids!
While pregnant with Caroline, Sloan and i came to the decision that we did not want any more kids. Also my OB recommended we do not have another baby because of my small pelvis it was getting to dangerous. Two was the limit which was fine with us, because I think two is more than enough for us! So, with this it meant getting a tubal ligation during my c-section when I had Caroline. Although it has been almost three years i still remember my OB explaining to me that I may have worse periods after my ligation, but I laughed at that. Since I was 10 years old my periods have been horrible, like soaking tampons can't get out of the fetal position cramps, and bloating...ugh it was horrible. So, yeah i thought "ha can't be any worse!"....I was wrong.
The first year after Caroline I went about 7 months without having period, and when I finally did start it was HELL!!!! Ever since that one my periods vary, I can go a few months where it is so light I don't need anything, which you would think "Oh how nice!". Yeah its nice for the time being, but I know what will soon come... After a few months of light periods I get HELL all over again. It is as if my body is trying to clear everything out that did not get out over the past few months. Cramps are like labor, and bloating is INSANE! In fact this week I have gained 10 lbs thanks to bloating, yes ten! I started today, and I gained another three lbs, so since Saturday I have gained 13 lbs, thirteen! It will all go away once HELL is over, but right now I look and feel horrible. I do not understand why I gain so much, it's not like I go all crazy and eat my way through a room full of food or anything! Nothing changes actually, I eat normal and sometimes less because of damn cramps. Besides I don't think you gain 13 lbs normally just by eating, right?
So...don't get your tubes tied kids!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)